As you probably already know I have two small dogs that rule
my world. One thing I’ve noticed (since
this is the first time I’ve had 2 dogs at the same time) is that they’re
terribly jealous and competitive. It
seems whatever one has; the other decides they need (even if they’d had access
to it before and never wanted it). Despite
the fact that I consistently give them the same treats, attention, etc. they
continue to act as if they’re at risk of being “cheated”, constantly monitoring
me to ensure things are being distributed equitably.
What I wish the pups understood is
that when I love on one of them, it doesn’t mean I love the other one any less
or that because I gave one attention that means I have less to give to the
other. I call this behavior the “attitude
of scarcity” – the feeling that whatever it is, there might not be enough of it. I remember growing up when there were hurricanes;
you could witness this in “panic shopping”.
You’d see people buying up groceries with the fear we might not have
access to the grocery store but it wasn’t always rational. People would buy up enough
food for a month where the reality was we’d never need to have that much food
stored up. While storing up canned peaches or tuna with the fear of not having
enough might be harmless, having this same "attitude of scarcity" about things
like joy, love, patience, forgiveness, etc. can have very negative
consequences. We can find ourselves limiting what we’re
willing to give with the fear being we have a limited supply or we get jealous
when we see someone else receiving these things with the false belief that because
they got it, it limits our ability to receive it also.
I have had people tell me things like “things have been
going great so something terrible must be around the corner”. This implies that the universe has a quota on
happiness so that if something good happens that has reduced your quota. Or I’ve heard, "I’ve met someone who seems
great but nothing lasts so I’m sure we’ll break up". It’s like all the beautiful things in life
like love and joy are measured in a cup and anytime we feel it, we lose a
little bit out of the cup. With that thought comes the belief that eventually the cup will be empty. I challenge
that the cup is never ending. It’s not
running out, it’s running over. We can’t
use it up fast enough. You can’t love too much, laugh too hard, or
have too much joy.
So, today smile and give someone a compliment. Tell the people you love that you love
them. Forgive anyone that has caused you
pain. Not because it will benefit them,
but because your cup is overflowing. Now
I’ve got some puppy bellies to rub simultaneously because my two pups don’t
understand that I’ll always have more than enough love for both of them.
